Thursday, November 17, 2016

Pas si simple



I understand.

It is not so easy, pas si simple, as to say that when I woke this morning there was a bank of fog so thick that I could not see the road ahead while walking the dogs...and then, the sun broke through to burn the brouillard away.

Perhaps you don't want to hear that right now, you are far too angry; or maybe you are dying to...just a little reassurance, fingertips to pat the top of your hand as your Grandmother once did. And then there are those who might raise their chins victoriously, certain that is exactly what happened.

Save that I am not talking in metaphors.

Or only partially.

In my daily life, I am often cotton cocooned in confusion. It is overwhelming being back in France on so many levels, especially after such a challenging yet undeniably fruitful eight months in the States. There has been elation and disappointment alike. I don't know exactly what I want or how long I will be here, which means that I have no idea what lies ahead.

 But so many of us are feeling this way. Not everything is personal.

I talked the dogs up the steps and onto the green to peer into formless knowing, the humidity dewing my cheek, dotting my eyelids. Noses to the ground, they found their way. 

In this new alone, I have to remember that I am not.

Because we just have to keep going. And by so doing, shining out light to burn away all that is obscuring our view. You know what light that is. I do too. The one that is not - not now, not ever - fueled by fear.

The sun did come out. And everything was clear. In that moment. Of course I am oversimplifying and nothing is so simple anymore. But that doesn't mean that I am hiding my gaze or turning solitary contrary just yet. No. I will fight for joy or beauty when I can get it and I want out of this confusion. So,

My eyes are open and they speak for me.

Still here, still here, still here.







I will take the postcards and the reality too. Simple is a (even if temporary) balm and only a very few of us can actually see ahead. "The only way past is through," on repeat. It is a start.


37 comments:

bonnie poppe said...

Lovely photos of the Rhone, still as glass. Not always, though, like life.

Bill Facker said...

Nature .. the great healer, bastion of happiness, luminary, and stimulator of Creative Urge .. wherever we are, whatever our circumstance. Ah, that nature has touched you and stimulated this post .. Mahalo et Merci, Heather

Judith Ross said...

I have been looking forward to your posts during this turbulent time. This one comes at exactly the right moment with a message I will hold onto. Merci, my friend.

francetaste said...

Thank you for your beautiful words and photos. Although you have shared your pain and suffering, what you write always carries such dignity and grace and elegance.

Winona Stewart said...

I think this is my favorite of your many beautiful posts. "In this new alone, I have to remember that I am not."
We're all in this together; so no, you are definitely not alone.
Beautiful photos, too. xo

Emm said...

Blessed be.

Stephen Andrew said...

What beautiful photographs! That foggy path is so beautiful. I think we've seen it once or twice in different light. I like fog for the same reason I love snow, it shrinks our worlds and heightens each detail. Every little thing unfolds in discovery. So wonderful that you're drinking in all the beauty!

Unknown said...

Glorious countryside, beautifully photographed, and insightful, lovely words. If only our President-Elect spent time outdoors (not on a golf course), if only he had ever had a dog, cat, or any pet, he might know so much of which he has not an inkling....You are not alone. Caring, Leslie in Oregon

hostess of the humble bungalow said...

The scenery is positively grand...enchanting almost...especially the way that you have captured its beauty.
You are definitely not alone.
XO

Greet Lefèvre said...

Oh dear Heather!!!! These pictures are so beautiful! They made my day! xx

robin said...

Yes, many of us are feeling this way! Both for general/political reasons and personal; it is a hard time - one where fear does want to reign supreme. So thank you for your words and photos - being in and observing nature does help; so do your lovely words. You are not alone - not ever - don't forget that very crucial point!

Silke B said...

"Lagadigadeu, la tarasco, lagadigadeu

Laissa passa la vieio masco. Laissa passa que vai dansa.
La tarasco dou casteu, la tarasco dou casteu"

Though la fête de la Tarasque is in May as far as I remember, these misty pictures of the Rhône evoked that "mystery" legend to my mind.

Where did you take them? Somewhere near you? Comment j'adore le broulliard.
Can't believe how green it is still chez toi, down there. Wish I was there!

Like the fog, confusion will vanish in some time. Meanwhile, follow your furry allies.

Thank you for letting us dream again!(We all need to, now)

Katherine said...

Such beautiful writing and photos, Heather. Hrre in the States, where I am at the moment for my daughter's wedding, I feel a strong sense of the surreal. I can barely watch the news. It all feels overwhelming. Thank goodness for my wonderful children and granddaughter, keeping me sane. :-)

Jan said...

Thinking for you, hoping for you all you'd wish for yourself. I cannot second guess it, but I want you to be OK and happy, whatever that takes. Jan xx

Heather Robinson said...

As we both know, Bonnie. xo

Heather Robinson said...

Mahalo to you, Bill.

Heather Robinson said...

I am so really glad to hear it, Judith. And I am really excited for all that you have in front of you. It is inspiring!

Heather Robinson said...

Thank you so much, C. Trying to find my way through just like we all are.

Heather Robinson said...

Winona, I really struggled with this post so thank you so very much for your response!

Heather Robinson said...

That makes me think of Ellie!

Heather Robinson said...

You know me with my memory, I am sure I have published photos of that same view several times! I was not happy with these photos...nothing like yours of late. xo

Heather Robinson said...

Sending Love to you, Leslie.

Heather Robinson said...

Thank you, friend.

Heather Robinson said...

You give me a lot of inspiration, Greet. I am happy to do the same for you for once. :)

Heather Robinson said...

love you sister.

Heather Robinson said...

Silke, I love that you thought of the Tarasque!!! These were photographed not far from there at all. ;)
Yes to dreaming, even now.

Heather Robinson said...

Oh, I am so happy that you are there!! I hope that the wedding is beyond beautiful and that the day is enjoyed by all...
Big hug to you, K! Wonderful news...

Heather Robinson said...

Thank you, Jan. "Ok and happy" is a pretty good goal, I think.

simpleimages2 said...

Two arrivals on the same place from two different perspectives, seen by the same pair of eyes with two different visions.

I love the photos.

Stephen Andrew said...

Why not?? I think they are so lovely! I love the jewel undertones!

Unknown said...

So beautiful...words and photos....just keep breathing ...one day at a time.

Ali x

Katherine said...

And a big hug back to you, dearest Heather.

Heather Robinson said...

I am so glad to hear that, Edgar. :)

Heather Robinson said...

Yep. One day at a time. bisous

Maria Anagnostopoulou said...

lovely, lovely photos!

Rainbowsandglories said...

Restorative. Wishing you every grace.

Janey and Co. said...

They tell me that life has peaks and valleys. Sometimes I think the hill we have to climb to get out of the valley is daunting, but as we strive to gain our footing, we realize that it is not such a hill after.

The pictures are beautiful.